The sun has passed its zenith in the day of my life and I feel the twilight coming on.  Always before it seemed my star would only ever continue to rise.  Its not darkening yet, but I can sense the change.  A day that felt as if it would go on forever fades ever so slightly.  There’s a modest cooling in the air, a meager lengthening of shadows, a minor dimming in the blazing glow.  All the signs manifest of something different in the wind. 

There have been changes before throughout the course of this day, my life.  Always in the past the new paths led to fresh horizons, novel satisfactions, unique beginnings.  These I followed with abandon and pursued heedless the consequences of the choice at the crossroad.  This time I feel the need for caution.  There is a certain trepidation; an impression of finality; the sensation of an ending.  This time it is different, more menacing, less forgiving the wrong decision made.  This time I sense my own mortality.   

As this evening of my life approaches, I realize the options are fewer, what’s at stake greater.  Those choices made without thought that brought me here, are not good enough anymore.  Blindly stumbling through the day, no worries but where the next indulgence will be found.  Something more this time must be considered.  As the day grows shorter the direction matters.  As the day grows shorter all the recklessness of the morning’s follies take toll. No time this time to go back and start again.  No time this time to chase a phantom, an illusion. 

The road I travel into the night cannot be selected with frivolity.  As those things that matter to me become fewer, they also become exceedingly important.  The journey now harder and I grow wary.  What I may carry with me into the darkness less and yet more.  This is my time to reassess.  This is my time to evaluate the objectives I place my energy into.  This is my time to take all that I have learned in my travels to find the path to true meaning and fulfillment in this the dusk of my day. 

I choose to see this as an opportunity to make good that poorly done earlier in the day, to make right those things put aside in favor of the corporeal and material pleasures I once deemed so vital to my happiness.  I will not rush in this time.  I will not stumble aimless this time.  I will not focus on the moment this time.  I will look down the road and have a plan.  I will make every effort now to meet the night with grace and thoughtfulness, not only of myself, but of all around me.  This time I will be the best I can possibly be as this time may be the last chance I have. 

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